Tag Archives: mindset

Spring Reflections

Trials are but lessons that you failed to learn presented once again, so where you made a faulty choice before you can now make a better one, and thus escape all pain that what you chose before has brought to you.

A Course in Miracles

How often do you audit your work life balance?

In business, one is encouraged to come up with  a plan which should be regularly reviewed …at least every 90 days. Achievable goals should be set and if they are not met , it’s OK to revise and tweak them so that a good outcome can be achieved. A good business plan will cover many areas, such as sales, marketing, networking and more. As the business evolves, so too does its needs. There is an ebb and flow of priorities in different areas.

For our personal lives too, we need to set goals so that we don’t just aimlessly drift into the sunset of dreams never fulfilled.  We may set a goal that  seems realistic at the time. Even setting what one networking person described to me as “a great big hairy audacious goal”.

All this is good,  but life will sometimes throw us a curve ball when we least expect it. The lessons to be learned when this happens are invaluable when we stop to reflect. Too much focus on a particular area will result in an imbalance in other areas unless we are diligent in maintaining a healthy work life balance. Many will be familiar with The Wheel of Life tool which is at the bottom of this post.

It’s important to have a positive mindset about any setbacks and ask ourselves the following questions.

  • What can I learn from this?
  • What could I do better next time?
  • What resources do I need to achieve the outcome I desire?
  • What goals do I need to set to achieve my outcome or vision?

Wheel of Life exercise

Six Signs of Sabotage

You’ve decided to do something about your weight. All goes well for a short time and then you may experience a plateau and in some cases a spiraling out of control and before you know it, you are back to where you started from.. perhaps even heavier.

How did that happen?

  1. Whilst a part of you wants to achieve success, there may be another part, an inner saboteur that is lurking within, ready to derail you. Sometimes the saboteur is someone near and dear to you. Family members, whilst often well-meaning, will sabotage your plans because of their own control issues. A partner may feel threatened by your new svelte and healthy appearance, subconsciously thinking that you will leave the relationship and sabotage your efforts by buying you chocolates or cakes.
  2. Are you drinking enough fluid? Water is preferable, but there are other non-calorific drinks such as herbal teas that are suitable. If you are dehydrated, you are sabotaging your weight loss by slowing the fat burning process down.
  3. Are you eating enough? Not eating enough puts the body into survival mode. After spending the night sleeping your blood sugar will have dropped, so skipping breakfast is another way to sabotage your weight loss. Make breakfast a priority and remember the saying “Eat breakfast like a King, lunch like a prince and dinner like a pauper.” Having a good breakfast will help with your concentration and give you more energy to get through the day.
  4. Are you eating too much? Sugars and refined carbohydrates can be sneaky little devils. Substituting with Aspartame or other chemical sweeteners is not the answer either. Watch your alcohol intake as it converts to a sugar when being processed by the liver. It is likely you are overestimating how much you are eating.  Even though you are choosing healthy foods on your weight loss journey, the portion size matters.
  5. You have bad habits around food. Sitting in front of the TV to eat is a common one. You will either be eating too quickly, or eating unconsciously. Set the table, eat mindfully, putting down your knife and fork between bites and really savour the food…the flavour and textures of your meal. Make it as much a feast for the eyes as it is about an intake of calories. Grazing on food, having “nibbles” readily available is another bad habit. Clear the pantry of those snacks, biscuits and other easy to eat temptations.
  6. Do you “treat” yourself with food? If that inner voice whispers to you “I lost weight so I deserve to have that chocolate/icecream/biscuit/cake…….” you need to review your mindset around food. That inner voice may also whisper to you “just one …..” which if you take the offer up, helps you to slide down the slippery slope of sabotage. If you are going to treat yourself, choose something that’s not food related, like a movie, a massage or a new item of clothing. Take a long term view of your weight loss journey and check in with your thoughts on a regular basis. Instead of thinking that you are deprived of something, change your mindset by asking “Is this a necessity?” or “Is this an obstacle to me achieving my goal weight?”

Chronic stress can also contribute to weight gain. Cortisol, released as part of the stress response, can cause you to have an increased appetite and to crave carbohydrates. A quick way to reduce stress is with exercise to counter the effects of the stress hormones and meditation to still the mind.

To help you still the mind, I’m sharing my 20 minute Easy Weight Loss video which you can use as a meditation or a screen saver.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SIYFBWAsmWs]

Mindset

ResentmentRecently I was reminded of an old folk tale coming from the Cherokee tradition.

An elder was teaching a young boy to recognize his inner self.  He told the young boy, ” I have this fight going on inside me….. it is terrible, like a fight between two wolves. One wolf is evil. Full of anger, arrogance, resentment, envy, greed, lies, ego, superiority, false pride and self-doubt and self-pity.”

“The other wolf is good. This one is loving, peaceful, full of joy and compassion, hope, kindness, serenity, truthfulness and generosity.  Everyone, including you has this same fight inside.”

The young boy looked at the old man and after a moment of deep thought, asked the elder, “Which wolf wins?”

To which the elder replied, “The one you feed.”

When we feed either wolf, or our mindset, we also strengthen the neural networks within us. So if we are in a negative or fixed mindset most of the time, then that’s the one that gets fed. Likewise if it’s a growth or positive mindset.

How can we tell which is which?

A person with a fixed mindset is more likely to believe that success is achieved by innate talent. They will make excuses that they are not good at being creative, artistic, sporting and so on…and will often seek to hide or disguise their flaws. They make themselves familiar with failure and use words like “I wish……”

On the other hand, a person with a growth mindset believes that through determination and hard work,  success can and will be achievable. They seek opportunities to develop their creative, artistic, sporting skills and will create a “to do” list to address their flaws. A person with this mindset will see setbacks as challenges to overcome.

So feed the mindset that you want.

Have a vision and set some achievable goals.

Love what you do…….