Endings and Beginnings

A Balanced Life, dreaming, , , ,

When Endings Are Really New Beginnings

Life has a funny way of playing musical chairs with us. One moment, the music is going, we’re twirling about happily, and then—suddenly—it stops. All of a sudden a chair we thought was ours disappears, a chapter wraps up, and we find ourselves blinking in the silence, wondering, what now?  That pause, though sometimes uncomfortable, isn’t really the end of the game. It’s the invitation to notice: a new round is about to begin. A different chair, a fresh perspective, a surprising possibility is waiting.

Endings and beginnings….

We often hear the phrase, when one door closes, another opens. And it’s true — but what’s rarely mentioned is the hallway in between. That liminal space where the old door has clicked shut but the new one hasn’t swung wide yet. Indeed, it’s here that we’re asked to pause, breathe, and listen deeply. The hallway is where the soul whispers its secrets.

Endings and beginnings….

In the Tarot, The World card carries this energy beautifully. It marks completion, wholeness, and the graceful closing of a cycle. But rather than a final curtain call, The World is a portal. It says, “You’ve danced this dance, and now the stage is clear for the next.” It’s not the end of the story — it’s a graduation into the next chapter of an unfolding journey.

I’m in the process of moving house and still in the stage of sorting 25 years of accumulated “stuff”. Chapters of life that have finished, like University notes, adult children’s kindergarten pictures and books that will never get re-read. I’m grateful for all those chapters. It’s also about setting aside projects or workshops as there’s simply not the energy or the time to fit it all in.  By allowing yourself time off, remember: you’re not losing ground. It’s self care. You’re doing the clearing. Releasing the past as you’re preparing the soil for the next dream to take root.

Endings and beginnings….

And maybe, just maybe, the real magic lies in the pause itself. That quiet moment between the old and the new, where the music hasn’t started up again, think of the space between the notes, and realising the room is alive with possibility.

Meanwhile, it’s time to make a cup of tea, lean into the spaciousness, and ask yourself: If the world has just closed one door for me, what fresh threshold might I be about to cross?

Tides, Terminals, and the Turn of a Leaf

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I came into the world on a tide—once, twice, the family cast off from familiar shores and sailed halfway across the world, not so much fleeing as following a call no one could name. Dad was always chasing something elusive and the grass always seemed greener elsewhere.

Childhood was a series of ships and tea chests, sometimes packed in haste and unpacked with quiet hope, where the sun felt strange and each place had a characteristic scent.

Where the sky was different. A contrast of pale skies hemmed in with close horizons and wide, open and vibrant skies. The horizon shimmering in the summer sun. Terminals for ships and trains. Both with the smell of big diesel engines getting ready to transport us to the next adventure.

We left village life and suburbia like shedding an old skin. One last tuckshop order wrapped in greaseproof paper before the energy of the bush claimed us.

There, time moved with the rustle of the old peppercorn tree planted at the front gate, and school clothes gathered red dust.

No uniforms here. What a contrast to the genteel atmosphere of the old school house and English gardens surrounding it, that had been left behind.

The few trees became tutors. Their lessons were soft but lasting: patience, stillness, and the sacred art of finding your way in tangled things. The undersides of tree leaves turning skyward in anticipation of rain.

Living in the bush carved another layer into me—a love for wide skies, pockets filled with rocks and feathers, a bicycle basket of Sturt Desert Pea flowers and a tendency to personify trees like old friends. It’s probably why I talk to plants and feel oddly soothed by the smell of eucalyptus and campfire smoke.

Changing schools felt like hopping stones across a river. Some were slick and uncertain; others caught me mid-leap with surprising kindness. I learned early how to read a room—then a country, then a climate.

I carried no accent, but spoke the unspoken dialect of adapting: listen first, laugh second, lay your roots lightly.

It’s no wonder, then, that now I read maps like tea leaves and find kinship in people with weathered stories. I can sense when a place won’t hold me—or when it already has. My bookshelf groans with collections of history books, novels and the metaphysical. My house is half sanctuary, half holder of memories where my own children grew up.

I still find comfort in the smell of books and eucalyptus. I was prone to rearranging the furniture when a storm brews, but when the last dog aged and became blind that practice had to stop.

I keep feathers like promises. I collect things I probably shouldn’t—seeds, old things, oracle cards….

I gravitate toward eclectic conversations and people with unusual earrings. I can’t commit to one tea, Yes, I have a whole cupboard devoted to different teas. And I still have a habit of subconsciously checking for exit signs in cafés, a relic of all those unfamiliar places.

Some call it restlessness. I prefer to think of it as tidal memory—my life still syncing to that first great departure from the warmth of the tropics to a cool English climate and then onto the wide open spaces of Australia..

A life shaped by tides, terminals and the turn of a leaf. Charting constellations both above and within. Sure, the constant moving meant I never had one “hometown,” but I did inherit a deep sense that home isn’t a place—it’s a patchwork quilt of moments, people, and curious habits stitched together with every hello and goodbye.

The Golden Era of Friendship

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Ah, the golden era of friendship: when you and your friends were wild, and possibly a bit unhinged, some were wise —but your friends for a lifetime. Or so you thought.

Now? Over the years, some have died (how dare they): to motorcycle accidents, medical conditions and unfortunately, some to old age. Those left may have drifted off into conspiracy or political  theory territory,  and a few… well, let’s just say the restricted or block button on social media has become your new best friend… as you find the need to scroll on by for your own mental health. Ah, the golden era of friendship!

Meanwhile, I’m knee-deep in the archaeological dig that is clearing out the family home.  Nothing says “character-building” like unearthing forgotten cooking treasures, a plethora of lids, that don’t match any containers, a cupboard full of seasonal wrapping paper and bags , and every birthday card ever written between 1979 and last year.

There’s a certain grief in letting go of a place that’s been a sanctuary for such a long time and moving on. A place that’s seen high school and University graduations. Births, weddings and funerals – not necessarily in that order. It’s weird. It shows up as laughter in the middle of vacuuming the carpets, as rage at a bird as it craps on your perfectly cleaned windows, and as quiet disbelief that somehow you’re the adult now.

Still standing.

Slightly dusty.

But still standing.

Straight and Narrow

A Balanced Life, Coaching, ,

perspective, straight and narrow thinking

Life can be perceived through various lenses, each offering distinct pathways and outcomes. One approach is the straight and narrow perspective, which emphasizes adherence to familiar routes, structured routines, and well-established beliefs. This method of viewing life can provide individuals with a sense of security and predictability, as it offers clear guidelines and boundaries to navigate the complexities of existence.

For example, many people find comfort in following traditional career paths, such as pursuing a stable job with a consistent schedule, which can lead to financial stability and a predictable lifestyle.

In contrast, an expansive, open-minded approach to life encourages exploration and the embracing of new experiences and ideas. This perspective involves questioning established norms, embracing change, and considering multiple viewpoints. By doing so, individuals can foster personal growth, innovation, and a deeper understanding of the world and themselves.

For instance, those who opt for this path might choose to travel extensively, engage in diverse cultural experiences, or pursue careers that challenge the status quo, such as in creative industries or entrepreneurial ventures. This approach can lead to significant personal development and a more comprehensive view of the world. Statistics show that individuals who adopt an open-minded attitude often report higher levels of life satisfaction and well-being.

 Ultimately, the decision between maintaining a straight and narrow view or adopting an expansive perspective is influenced by personal preferences and life circumstances.

Each path offers unique benefits and challenges. For some, a structured approach may provide the stability they need, while others may thrive in environments that encourage exploration and innovation. Finding a balance between these two perspectives can lead to a fulfilling and enriched life, allowing individuals to experience the security of routine while remaining open to growth and new possibilities.

Time and Tide

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The quote “Time and tide wait for no man” – attributed to Chaucer is written on a side plate that I have used since a small child. The time seems to have flown since the last posting here and that could also be attributed to age!!

Late last year we put the city house on the market and in hindsight (such a wonderful thing) the timing was awry. Too close to Christmas, interest rates, the annual Australian shutdown over summer….. so many reasons. There was a mad rush to declutter some 20+ years of stuff and furniture settings were hired for several rooms in time for the photos.

Energetically, the rooms that had the hired furniture for the photos made it feel like it was no longer “home”. Not for sitting on, just for show. New, unfamiliar energies entered the house, with the stress of making sure everything was spick and span for inspections, plus the energies of strangers and neighbours as they traversed each room, opened drawers and cupboards and viewed the garden. Some days felt like we needed more sage than usual.

Christmas and January passed in a blur. Time and tide wait for no man. Inspections on weekends. Grandchildren came frolicked in the sparkling swimming pool during the school holidays. Downside to that meant that there was frequent window washing looking out onto the pool area from the jumping in. Upside was that they developed confidence in their swimming.

February saw workshops starting up again and there was frustration at finding that I had packed so many of my books that help me with my research. And so February morphed into March and soon it will be April. Time and tide wait for no man.

New Moon New Year

A Balanced Life, ,

A second New Moon for December 2024 and here in Australia it falls on the last day of the year. Called a “Black Moon” as two new moons in a calendar month are not often experienced, it has come at an ideal time. New Moons are about manifesting / setting goals for the month ahead. With the new year of 2025 ahead of us, it’s an ideal time to write a new chapter.

Never mind the New Year “resolutions” – most of those go by the wayside before the first two months of the year have finished! See this as an opportunity to review where you have been focusing your energy on and decide if that is what you want to continue to do in the months ahead.

Imagine if you no longer invested your attention or energy into the things that didn’t work for you in 2024 and focused on what is possible in the coming months.

Dream large and set some goals for the year – starting with the end in mind and work backwards to flesh out the steps needed to achieve them month by month, week by week, day by day. It’s the little steps (coaches call this “action”) and it will enable you to turn those dreams into reality.

Community

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A little while ago I was asked if I would do a community radio interview with Sally from Volunteer for Knox. I have volunteered in various organizations for many years, so I agreed. Volunteering is more than working at the local op shop or for the CFA. It’s about a sense of contributing to the wider community. There are numerous opportunities to serve as a committee or board member for clubs, associations and charities. My last volunteer position was as Secretary/Public Officer of the Monash Business Awards, a role I did for 8 years.

My focus these days is on stress management and Art Therapy. One piece of information that I came across whilst researching stress and its effects, was that because volunteers “feel good” about what they are doing, they are more likely to produce “happy hormones”, which in turn helps with a stronger immune system.

You can listen to the interview HERE.

The Power of Art Therapy for Stress Management

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Regular art therapy sessions offer a creative, gentle way to reduce your stress and boost mental well-being. By focusing on the process—not the outcome—of creating art, you can experience:

🧠 Mindfulness: Engaging in creative activities naturally promotes mindfulness, helping you stay present and release worries about the past or future.

✨ Emotional Release: Art provides a safe outlet to express feelings that might be hard to put into words.

💪 Increased Resilience: Reflecting through art helps you process emotions, building inner strength and resilience over time.

There’s no artistic skill required—just a willingness to explore! Art therapy can be a powerful tool for reducing stress and nurturing your mental health.

Orbs

Energy, , , ,

Orbs  or flashes of light in photos can be interpreted in many ways. I find it fascinating and it intrigues me when I discover that I’ve taken a photo that appears to have an orb in a photo.  I often get a glimpse of something just out of range of normal vision and when I turn my head there is nothing there.

Some believe that this can indicate a spiritual presence, a manifestation of energies and symbolic. The presence of orbs can be symbolic of Spirit Guides or Angels or even deceased family members or loved ones. Another explanation is that they are flashes of condensed energy appearing in locations where there is heightened spiritual energy.

Scientific Explanations

While many people attribute metaphysical meanings to orbs, it’s also important to consider scientific explanations:

  • Dust Particles: Orbs can often be caused by dust particles, moisture, or insects reflecting the camera’s flash.
  • Lens Flares: Reflections or lens flares can create orb-like effects in photographs.

Either way, the interpretation is deeply personal.

Colours and Meanings:

Different colours of orbs are often associated with different metaphysical meanings. For example:

  • White or Clear Orbs: Often seen as positive, representing purity, truth, and spirituality.
  • Blue Orbs: Associated with calmness, peace, and spiritual guidance.
  • Green Orbs: Linked to healing, love, and connection with nature.
  • Red Orbs: Might indicate strong emotions, such as anger, passion, or warnings.

I’ve seen orbs when using old fashioned film and SLR cameras, but more frequently with digital cameras and phone cameras.  They seem to pop up in the most unusual places.

This photo was taken at the June Full Moon (just a day after the Winter Solstice) and I was taken by the shimmering on the leaves as well.

I had spent the day in working on creating a spiritual workshop and meditating on the various activities. It was quite late at night and the temperature was dropping rapidly towards -1’C.

No doubt the halo around the moon was due to the atmospheric conditions and a forecast of the coming frost or it could simply mean that my iPhone camera doesn’t take good moonlight photos!

This next photo was taken in Hobart about 14 years ago after having spent some time with my Reiki Teacher. We had spent the day having lunch and deep discussions about Reiki energy. I felt that the energy around the sailing ship had something to do with this orb. On the other side of the harbour was the Greenpeace ship, the Sea Shepherd and no orbs.  Such a contrast in styles of both ships and their energies.

My interpretation is that orbs are spiritual manifestations as they only seem to appear on my camera after I have meditated or am grounded and aware of my surroundings.

 

 

 

Setting Boundaries

A Balanced Life, Emotional Intelligence, , , ,

Setting Boundaries with Frenemies

In every social circle, there are friends, acquaintances, and then, occasionally, frenemies. Frenemies, or those who present themselves as friends but act in ways that undermine you, can be challenging to navigate. Establishing boundaries with frenemies is crucial for maintaining mental and emotional well-being.

Here’s a comprehensive guide to help you set those boundaries effectively and protect your well-being.
First – Understand the Frenemy Dynamic

Frenemies can often be subtle in their undermining actions, making it tricky to identify and address their behavior. Common traits of frenemies include:

  • Gossiping: They may spread rumors or talk negatively about you behind your back.
  • Backhanded Compliments: Their compliments often come with an undercurrent of negativity
  • Inconsistency in Behavior: They may be supportive one moment and critical the next.
  • Competition: They seem to view your achievements as a threat rather than a cause for celebration.

Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward setting necessary boundaries.

Why Boundaries Are Important.

Boundaries are essential in any relationship to ensure mutual respect and understanding. With frenemies, boundaries help protect your self-esteem, mental health, and overall well-being. They prevent the frenemy from having undue influence over your emotions and actions.

6 Steps to Establish Boundaries

  1. Identify the Behaviors That Need Addressing: Be clear about what actions or behaviors from the frenemy are unacceptable to you. This clarity will help you communicate your boundaries effectively.
  2. Communicate Clearly and Assertively: When setting boundaries, use “I” statements to express your feelings without sounding accusatory. For example, “I feel uncomfortable when you make jokes at my expense,” instead of “You always insult me.”
  3. Limit Personal Information Sharing: Keep your conversations with frenemies surface-level. Avoid sharing sensitive or personal information that they could use against you.
  4. Set Limits on Interaction: Decide how much time and energy you want to invest in the relationship. It’s okay to decline invitations or distance yourself if interactions with the frenemy leave you feeling drained or upset.
  5. Be Consistent: Consistency is key to maintaining boundaries. If a frenemy crosses a line, address it every time it happens. This reinforces your boundaries and shows that you are serious about them.
  6. Seek Support from True Friends: Surround yourself with friends who genuinely support and uplift you. Their positive influence can help counterbalance any negativity from frenemies.

Strategies for Maintaining Boundaries

  • Practice Self-Care: Prioritize activities that boost your mental and emotional health. Exercise, hobbies, and relaxation can help you stay resilient against any negativity from frenemies.
  • Reevaluate the Relationship: Over time, assess whether maintaining a relationship with a frenemy is worth the effort. Sometimes, it’s healthier to let go of toxic relationships altogether.
  • Use Social Media Wisely: Be mindful of your interactions on social media. You can unfollow or mute a frenemy without fully severing ties, reducing their presence in your digital life.

Dealing with Reactions

Frenemies might resist or react negatively to your boundaries. They might try to guilt-trip you, manipulate situations, or increase their negative behavior. Stand firm and remember why you set those boundaries in the first place. If necessary, limit your contact further or seek advice from a trusted friend or counsellor. Better still, work on strengthening your own Emotional Intelligence so that you can construct effective boundaries.

Establishing and maintaining boundaries with frenemies is a proactive step toward safeguarding your emotional and mental well-being. By identifying problematic behaviors, communicating assertively, and being consistent, you can manage these challenging relationships more effectively. Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your happiness and peace of mind over maintaining a relationship that brings negativity into your life.