Category Archives: clarity

Intention

A great part of my work centres around intention. In Reiki workshops we always set an intention. Likewise in a coaching session, the intention is set to discuss a positive outcome for you. Your intention can be conscious or unconscious and a skeptic would suggest that the use of a pendulum to gauge answers has an unconscious bias.

intention and setting goalsDo you ever get an idea that needs to be recorded, but either your phone is flat or there isn’t a notepad nearby? I usually have a pen in my car or handbag and the backs of envelopes come in handy and the intention is to use or put these ideas into practice as soon as possible.  During a recent tidy up, I discovered a bundle of envelopes that were covered in notes and various ideas from several years ago. I made the decision to transcribe each one to store on the cloud. Before I knew it, I had a coaching program written and some articles for here which I would love to share with you over the next few weeks.

In setting an intention, conscious or otherwise, it is useful to use a great coaching model called Be, Do, Have.

Who are you going to be in this process? If you are going to be a leader or a teacher, you are going to have to honour yourself.  What insights are you likely to get as you lead or teach and where is the gift?

A well used saying in my Reiki training is “Energy flows, where focus goes.” For any therapist or coach, if you are focusing on a positive intention or outcome then it is most likely that you will get results.

An interesting exercise is to pick a couple of areas in your life that you want to work over the next few months and be your own hero in relation to these. As you focus on these particular areas, you engage an area within your brain called the RAS (Reticular Activating System) which will help you to filter out unnecessary stuff.

The more you become your own hero in your story, you will find that you start finding unexpected gifts, such as a calling or strength that you had put aside. If you have doubts about this, start asking yourself some harder questions – “What will happen if I decide to hang on to these doubts or unhelpful/outdated beliefs?”

A helpful strategy is to evaluate what this means to you. Are you taking responsibility for your thinking, because in a spiritual Universe, we are all perfect and doing the best we can with the resources available to us. All of this is well and good, but if you don’t take action then life will stay the same……..

If you are ready to make changes, then contact me….

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Overcoming Issues

We all have issues… some big, some small and it is our response that determines the outcome.

Do you have a default behaviour that you return to when an issue pops its head up and confronts you?

Do you face it head on and resolve to create a positive outcome?

Do you react in ways that make you or others around you uncomfortable?

What is the risk to you if you continue to respond this way?

A client recently wanted to discuss how to handle an issue with a person that he has known for some 30 plus years. Never really close, he became aware that this person was “giving off negative vibes” but didn’t know why.

The issue came to a head recently when he was walking into a garden centre and walking straight towards him was this person. He smiled and went to say “hello”, whereupon the other person turned their head and walked off in a different direction. The client described how he felt his insides turn and he felt like a small child at school again. He described how one part of him wanted to pursue the person and confront him, yet another part of him just wanted to cry as he felt abandoned.

I handed him a poem that I have found useful to refer to over the years :

Reason, Season, Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Thank you for being a part of my life,
whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

 Brian Andrew  Chalker

After several sessions, he came to the conclusion that any previous friendship was fractured beyond repair and decided that he would let it go. He had extended the hand of friendship and reconciliation several times over the last few years, but was being rebuffed each time …. Each time he experienced an internal response of a profound sense of rejection. He was no longer comfortable with feeling this way and wanted to change how he reacted yet  was saddened that they had not been able to communicate with each other to resolve any problems in earlier times. In the hypnotic state, the client then expressed gratitude to his friend for having been in his life for a season and asked for forgiveness for any hurts that he may have unintentionally caused.

After that session he said that he had realized it was almost like picking at a scab …..the wound opens up again, the skin weeps a bit and a new scab is formed, but if you do this too often the skin hardens up and a scar is made.

 

Letters I’ve written

Or should that be posts that I’ve written…. never meaning to send………
.. with apologies to the Moody Blues. This song came out way back, I had just moved to Melbourne for the first time (& yes, for a boy…maybe one day I will write about that).
Whenever I can catch some spare time from the clinic – usually when a client has rescheduled – I make an effort to sit down and write a few blog posts that I can post at a later date.

It’s interesting as I peruse the entries that I thought were pertinent….. so many of them no longer hold any meaning and don’t get posted. This document is like a journal, partly relating to my business persona and partly relating to events in my personal life. So often it is the writing down that leads to the catharsis and I believe it is important to leave some time and space before posting.
Just recently I’ve gone to post the next entry and hesitated…. I haven’t deleted the entry, because it was relevant at that time, but time and space has given me the wisdom to take into account whether it was a whinge or helpful to someone else.

“Beauty I’d always missed
With these eyes before,
Just what the truth is
I can’t say anymore.”

The beauty of doing this is that it is a reflection of my emotions at the time. Re-reading at a later date allows me to calibrate and look within to see if I have reacted to the situation or have applied the emotional intelligence techniques I seek to help others with.
Am I wise? Am I telling the truth?
We each have our own truth and expressing it to others may not be palatable to the recipient.

I have someone in my life who has written many letters, most probably on the advice of their therapist, and sent them….resulting in hurt and fracturing relationships. My advice is if you are to write these letters, do so and then burn them…..symbolically releasing the energy contained within to the Universe and thus letting go and letting a higher power (insert whichever deity you believe in here) take care of it for you. There have been several occasions recently when I have held my breath, waiting for a letter from this person after things didn’t go as they had planned. To tell the truth, I was a little disappointed that I didn’t get one as I was looking forward to composing a reply and thus stepping out of Emotional Intelligence.

There are other times where I may write about a something that was profound and on looking back at that moment realizing that I captured a moment of beauty….of realization ….that has led to an insight that I missed at the moment of writing. Like a sunrise or sunset, nothing stays the same…. Change is inevitable and these transitions can create amazing shifts in our consciousness. It’s all about letting go…..

Sadness

It was an odd Monday afternoon a while back.

The weather was about to change from hot to a thunderstorm and I had just had a conversation with an old (long time) friend when I was suddenly overcome by a wave of sadness.

It was similar to a feeling experienced when I was walking the labyrinth one Sunday morning – the sadness coming like a roller coaster wave that dumps you in the sand. On returning home to the city we discovered that the aging cat had died in her basket. She was still a little warm, so she must have crossed that rainbow bridge around the time that I felt that sadness a few hours previously.

I couldn’t shake the feeling that someone I knew had died, but refrained from voicing my concern as I am still familiarizing myself with intuitive feelings and didn’t want to alarm anyone.

Then on the Tuesday afternoon the news came through. An acquaintance in another state had passed away over the weekend and the feeling of sadness suddenly made sense.

As I finally spend more time on a regular meditation practice and teaching more Reiki, I find that I am more “in tune” with events and emotions around me.

5 Steps to Visualizing Success

Using Guided Visualization or Hypnotherapy to create a new mindsetCreate a quiet space. Turn off the phone, the tablet the computer… if you have trouble disconnecting completely use the “aeroplane mode” so that you won’t be disturbed while you are doing your visualization. Check that there is nothing else to distract your attention either…..dogs, cats etc…and make sure the ambient temperature is just right and you are sitting in a comfortable position.

Take a deep breath and as you exhale, close your eyes. Do several more deep breaths, breathing in relaxation and exhaling any tension.  You may notice your heart rate slowing down a little and as your eyes are closed, you will be more aware of other sensations and noises in your environment.

In your mind’s eye, imagine your success participating in a particular endeavour dear to you. You don’t have to disclose your vision or goal to anyone else. Make the picture clear and focus on the details. Include the sounds you would hear, feelings of how you would feel if you were to jump into or become a part of this vision.  Are there any smells that you can add that would make the vision even stronger?  Expand your vision further by using your imagination to hear what others are saying and how positively they are reacting to your success. As your vision gets clearer, notice how your feelings change. Keep this picture in your mind’s eye and see yourself achieving even more, setting and achieving goals easily and effortlessly…. manifesting the success that you are destined for.

To create new and successful thought pathways  and to reprogramme your subconscious mind you need to practice. Just as you need to practice a musical instrument or a sport to become proficient, visualizing or manifesting requires some effort. Done daily or even twice daily, using positive language …. as if your success is happening right now…. will make it more real.

Take your time….create a quality vision and be open to what comes up during your sessions, as your subconscious mind will seek to bring you even more clarity to your visualization. New and unexpected opportunities and synchronicities will pop up as you refine your vision and the time spent in this meditative state will have other benefits such as enhanced creativity and an inner peacefulness. After each session, journal your insights or add to your vision board.

Health

HealthAt a networking meeting that I co-host, I had a conversation with a couple of Reiki Masters….

I haven’t had a Reiki for myself for some time and have kept myself busy in various ways…. working on my business, the retreat…family…..day to day stuff…..

The question was asked…”what are you doing for YOU?” as I coughed, feeling it deep within my chest…. “what are you telling YOUR clients and not doing for yourself?”…..

I knew then, that there was no hiding…. no excuses! I couldn’t blame the alignment of the planets, other people…

Time to ‘fess up, so as to speak. Isn’t that what the metaphysics is all about? Oh Dear!! I felt all teary!     Cough…Throat Chakra? One of the Reiki Masters chuckled… that’s her speciality… pushing buttons…..

Yes… I needed that…. someone to ‘call me’ on my authenticity!

isn’t it amusing how the Universe works? It sends you clients who tell you “stuff” that you need to work on for yourself.

There are two options..

  1. Be like the metaphorical ostrich and stick your head in the sand and ignore what is going on – pretend nothing is wrong and carry on….
  2. Do something about it…. take the oxygen mask that has dropped down and look after yourself first before looking after others…

I shared a little of what I was feeling at the meeting, still holding back on other issues that I thought I would work some more on changing my mindset.

A colleague popped her head into my office between clients and offered an opinion – and  another friend phoned during a free moment…

I was feeling exhausted and hoping for the Universe to offer a solution….. which of course it did later this evening

… so with a few minutes left of a busy day, I have resolved to take up the offer of a Reiki and deal with some personal issues – so that I can be more present for the clients that have chosen to book in with me…..

 

 

Clarity

 

Can’t see the wood for the trees?trees

Sometimes you just need to step away to get a better perspective on things.

Stop……… relax……. breathe deeply…….look up and then into the distance and realize that by re-focusing your eyes or your energy, you can take a look at what you have been doing in a different way.

Just recently, I threw myself into a project that I thought would benefit others. I immersed myself in research, looked for the best possible expert in a particular field and in the process, lost my perspective and personal work/life balance. big tree

What happens when you get too close to a project? Maybe it’s a case of seeing too much wood and not enough of the tree and beyond…..

Look at the difference in perspective…. same tree, different angles. In the latter, the detail of the bark shows up and in the former, the greatness of the tree is revealed. Tapping into the beauty of the tree and the saplings around it, allowing the leaves to create a canopy that shelters the creatures nearby. There is more room to move, to cast one’s eye over in the first photo.

In focusing closely on the second picture,  the field of vision is narrowed. The eye is drawn upwards, following the grain of the bark to a focused point at the top. This pathway guides you in no uncertain terms to a focal point at the top, but is not  a flexible, fluid pathway.

It’s important to choose a perspective that allows you to move forward that honors and respects not only others, but yourself. Quiet contemplation and reflection will allow you to choose a path that takes you forward in such a way that the shared journey is pleasant and productive.

 

An Astrological New Year

Just recently, the astrological influences were full of Chiron in almost every aspect of my chart.
Fortunate to be offered a chance to be a “case study” for a friend undertaking post graduate qualifications, I saw this as an opportunity to work on “The Wounded Healer”.

Interesting what came up for me at this time and I have started working on an outline for a new book as a result.

I’m happy to have help from all areas, including Astrology, Tarot and the spirit world, if it brings some clarity to my life.
I subscribe to a daily forecast for Gemini and find that the readings are generally pretty spot on for me…. today’s was interesting!

“Despite the fact that you’re now in the early days of your birthday month and new solar year and you even have a New Moon in 2 days time that will ask that you draw a new line in the sand, it’s too soon to fully turn your back on the past. Instead you have the luxury of being able to leave the doors to the past open, retaining a clear view of the rear view mirror and the road ahead. At any time, when you’re unsure what new steps you should take, you’re free to look back to the past for inspiration.

 It’s crossroads time again……
I’m drawn to spending more time up at the retreat ….. but that requires some building extensions and serious electrical and plumbing work to make it work. As well as deciding whether I will go to live up there full time at some stage,.
Then there is a decision to make as to whether I keep paying rent on the clinic room I have at present (especially if I’m not there all the time). It might make more economic sense to let it go and use my home office again, now that dear old Ben the Labrador is no longer there to cry at the closed door.

I turned to Colette Baron-Reid’s The Enchanted Map this morning for a 6 card reading. 5 cards fell on the floor as I was shuffling, so I kept them and laid them out in the order they fell, then picked a final card from the cut deck to make up the 6.

  1. Past Influence – Magic Stream (Reversed)Swimming against the current… time to stop “trying”, jump into the stream and float……immersing yourself and be fully present in the moment. Many of my talks have been on Meditation and Mindfulness. I have an emWave (which sat idle for many months … time to walk the talk and be fully present.
  2. Present Point – Rock Bottom – This is the point where you can go no further doing what you have been doing. The old way of doing things must be discarded in order to move fully onward and upward. A new direction & strategy are needed. Surrender, accept things as they are & synchronicity will sort things out. By letting go completely a miracle can occur…Wasn’t it Einstein who said that the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over again? Time to get over myself and use the gifts and therapy tools in a different way. Let go and let God is another saying that one of my teachers gave me…..
  3. What you resist – Intention – Inspired intentions are like magic arrows shot into the sky….connect to the power of intention, let others help to co-create reality & allow synchronicity to work the magic. Own the life you want to lead & live deliberately…..Rather than daydreaming, it’s time to focus the intention on what I really  want…. making some positive goals, setting time frames …. all the very things I ask clients to do……..
  4. Unexpected Help – Rescue You are always safe and secure, and free to be yourself are the words at the top of the guide to this card…Asking for help isn’t easy for many successful people. However, that’s what you need to do now as you expand your life. Ask and assistance will come your way and the expected support will come from Spirit. With the right relationship with the Divine, conditions will line up and help will arrive….. It’s easy to forget to ask Spirit and the Angels for help. It has always come in the past and for that I have been grateful. I’m sure gratitude is the key ….
  5. The next right action – Encouragement The last card in this deck... “you are receiving a nudge in the right direction”…. Step into your power, into the dream of your life. New things are out there to be explored and the universe is giving you a nudge in the right direction. You will get the help you need and won’t be alone in your quest. Every step is supported by the wisdom of the universe. You are on the right path….. keep going! Not the time to give upMemo to self…. stop wallowing, take the Victim stamp off your forehead…. yes the past has had some difficult circumstances, but it is the past and like the astrological reading says, view it in the rear view mirror as you drive  with a clear view to a new destination – the future…
  6. Probable future destination – Mountain “You have the capacity to flow around any obstacle. This is the time to adapt”…. what seems to be an insurmountable obstacle, like a mountain is in the path of success. Rather than climb it, be like the rivers that flow around mountains naturally. Adapt to circumstances. If you do climb it, take one step at a time…. 

And so the reading comes full circle….. I do have to chuckle at what a random set of cards will come up with.

Just to be sure I drew one more card for my Soul’s Intention. 
Home – Peace, security, safety, belonging are all features one would want from “Home” are indicated now. Time for opening your eyes to your tribe of like minded people. … home is love & it’s all around you ….you are where you are meant to be and will reap great benefits by staying on this path, regardless of where it leads  – Home is where the heart is!! I found this reading to be quite educational. Certainly there are layers that need to be further unpacked.  
Already we are beginning to come into the energy of the New Moon on Thursday. This makes it an excellent time to do a series of meditations on this reading and create the intent to move forward at the same time as letting go of ego’s investment in the outcome. 
A great time to set new goals, which model to use?  
SMART, GROW, Be Do Have or another? 
Maybe all of the them as an exercise to gain clarity.
Behavioural flexibility is yet another key…… I can’t change the world, but I can change the way I think, what I do, which in turn will change my physiology and my perspective.


 

Stepping off the merry go round

There is the Zen parable that tells of the young monk who stumbled and as he fell, caught hold of some bamboo to steady himself. The Zen Master accompanying him asked if he noticed that the bamboo bent, yet was strong enough to support him. He also asked the novice if he had also noticed how bamboo gets pushed around by the wind, yet always grows tall towards the sunlight above….not snapping… a most resilient plant…..

It took quite a lot of courage for me to finally say “No – I’m not going to that function” & I did it with the help of the grief counsellor that I’ve been seeing this past year. Not reaching snapping point, but that stillpoint inside where there is a knowing that it is time to do the “right thing” for myself.

Girls are raised to “do the right thing” and for many years, I’ve acquiesced and gone along to functions where I haven’t felt comfortable. One girlfriend laughed many years ago, when I told her of the story of bending in the wind like the grass or bamboo….. she suggested “doormat” would be a better description.

I’ve never really enjoyed the hoopla and razzle dazzle of tinsel and false bonhomie…The over indulgences in the senses with food or the misappropriation of sacred music that has been turned into Musak for the masses long before Advent starts. I’ve long thought that Christmas really doesn’t suit the introverted empath!
This year I wanted to experience some peace and serenity on my own …. not long … a few hours would suffice.
My soul needed some lush, green energy to repair.
Sunday morning saw some chores completed and then I set off on my adventure. Fully intending to go to the beach, not that I really enjoy the beach, I started to drive. I asked that I be guided to where I needed to be, (& please include an Oak tree!) I took familiar roads and realized that I was near a pretty picnic spot in the Dandenongs. No room in the carpark… full! Not what I wanted at all even though the tree ferns looked spectacular….. Then I saw a side road, it looked as if it might be interesting and made my way along that. Lots of tight curves and it required full attention to drive…. nothing like mindfulness and being in the moment!
As I emerged to the top of the hill a sign caught my eye… some Memorial Gardens….. a little further down the road I decided to go back and investigate. I parked, wandered in a little hesitantly as the place seemed deserted….and read the sign….

You really do have to chuckle at what the Universe throws up at you!

 I was born a Harper (not the same family that developed the gardens). It seemed that this was just the right place to be…. I wondered if there was an Oak tree……
 Following the meandering paths, I came to a small clearing and there was a majestic Oak tree.. with a bench nearby to sit on and contemplate the surrounds.
 It was time to just “be”. As another saying goes, “we are human BEings, not human DOings”.
Curious about the rest of the gardens, I set off to explore… masses of Hydrangeas starting to flower… a few months ago the Camelias and Azaelias would have been centre stage.
So many varieties of Japanese Maples, their delicate leaves providing texture and colour to the backdrop of so many interesting plants.
Another strategically placed bench and contemplation of the Foxgloves for a few moments.
Observing how the Currawong family were playing in the branches of tall trees.

Before I knew it, a couple of hours had passed & I had a phone call from my son wondering if I was OK.

Yes I was…. better than I have been for some time…. a combination of the energy of the gardens and finally stepping into my integrity.
Walking back to the Oak tree, I noticed a couple of brightly coloured butterflies, dancing in the sun and the dappled shade.

Symbols of transformation, of finding joy in life and a symbol of the soul….

Healing through readings

Every so often I have a need to go to the Oracle cards for clarity.
My favourite style of reading is to select a number of cards from different decks, place them in a grid and then read them. Jotting down the messages from both the pictures and the accompanying booklets and then typing them up.
Quite amazing how a message will jump out – the same message from different decks providing an affirmation that Spirit is wanting to pass something on!! A quick “cut and paste” will arrange the main points coherently….

Those who know me, will be aware that the last few months have been difficult to say the least …..

Intellectually I thought I was prepared for Dad to move into a different realm and was blessed to have conversations with him as he did so. He described walking into a large open space, with lots of lights and some people coming to greet him.

Perhaps now I will do the Lives between Lives Hypnotherapy training!
What I wasn’t prepared for, was the physical effects of the grief.
The emotional roller coaster and the fatigue. I have found myself struggling to maintain a positive physiology and just the other day, this was brought to my attention when an acquaintance, who is a shaman, came into the tearoom and asked if I was OK.

I haven’t been to the cards for myself for a while and today I was drawn to do a reading before starting work on a presentation for next week and am sharing it here.

I used 3 packs – Collette Baron-Reid’s The Enchanted Map, Doreen Virtue’s Archangel Oracle Cards  and Ascended Masters.

Know that it is safe to teach and at the same time be open to new ideas. Overcoming the previous difficulties and challenges have made you stronger. Your experiences are not a single story, but they filter into one another. 
Teach others from this experience and teach topics that awaken your passion. 

Good fortune, ambitions will be fulfilled as you enter into a time of happiness long overdue.
Everything is connected through the universal flow of consciousness and this connection will allow synchronicity to work its magic.  
When you use clear and focussed intention and have positive expectations the inspiration will flow and you will become a channel for inspiration.
Live deliberately and with focus. 
Trust in the inner knowledge – embrace it and trust…

Meditate, use clear and focussed attention to reach inner peace. 

Let go of self doubt and ignore the critics and skeptics and know that Spirit is supporting you, 

even if there are people around who are not.
Abundance will come through living life authentically.
 Listen to your heart’s truth.