5 Steps to Surviving the Summer Holidays

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Summer is just a few weeks away and the festive season is getting closer. Whether you look forward to it or dread it, the holiday season can be stressful for many reasons but it is possible to get through this time by following these steps.

  1. Remember to breathe…… establishing a routine for deep breathing prior to the holidays will result in this becoming second nature to you when you are in a stressful situation. A simple and effective breathing technique, done first thing in the morning and last thing at night, is to lie on your back with your hands over your belly and the fingers just touching each other. Take a deep breath into your belly area and your fingers should separate slightly and then exhale slowly allowing your belly to go flat. Do this ten times. If you find you lose count, then exert a slight pressure on each finger after every exhalation. Do it often enough and it will become a habit, then when there is a stressful situation you can trigger the relaxation by placing a hand on your abdomen and gently counting the breaths and exerting a slight pressure on the fingers.
  2. Stay in the moment…cultivate mindfulness as a strategy. When you are eating…..eat. Avoid distractions such as eating in front of the TV or whilst reading a newspaper. Be aware of the flavour, texture, smell, feel of the food and be especially aware of when you feel full. It’s OK to say “No” to second helpings or to leave some food on the plate. If there is a vast array of food, see this as an opportunity to create a small “tasting plate” and again be aware of the presentation, texture, flavours, smell of the food and whether it is a “friend or foe” to your body. Be curious about the preparation, the combination of flavours or where the food originated from. Listen to a hypnosis CD so that your subconscious mind can help you to make the right decisions about food choices when in social situations.
  3. Give within your means….. this applies not only to presents, but to your time and also what you are giving to yourself in the way of “treats”. If you love to bake, then do so and give away your creations to family and friends. If you are giving your time, make sure that you leave enough for yourself to enjoy the occasion and remember that it is OK to say “No” to demands on your time and energy.  Visualize a bubble around you that allows loving thoughts in and blocks any negative vibrations. If you are intending on giving yourself a “treat”, make it a massage instead of a meringue or a pedicure instead of a pie….
  4. Stick to routines and structure as much as possible…. Have a plan. Most holiday stress comes about from that last minute rush to make everything perfect. Set goals that are realistic. Map out whether there are any obstacles to achieving the goals and work out the best way forward.
  5. Acknowledge your emotions….. the holiday season can be difficult if you have had a bereavement or change in family structure. Spend time reflecting on what traditions you would like to keep and what you would like to change. Have a plan, this may be that you decide to keep the celebrations the way they have always been. Plan B is always a good backup to default to if you realize as you head to a social situation that you need some time alone. It’s quite alright to plan to leave a celebration a little early if you feel overwhelmed. Rescue Remedy is a great help at times like this and if you see a homeopath, ask for some specific grief remedies to help you get by.  Another useful therapy is Hypnotherapy, where you can bypass your conscious mind and use a variety of techniques to help you deal with either difficult people or situations. Smile….. even if you don’t feel like it…. the muscles in your face will send messages to your brain and release endorphins to reduce stress…. Laugh…. a good laugh is contagious and also reduces stress. ….. but above all – be authentic and acknowledge how you are feeling and share how you are feeling.

*article shared with Healthy Energy Summer 2015 Newsletter.

Spring Reflections

balance, Coaching, , ,

Trials are but lessons that you failed to learn presented once again, so where you made a faulty choice before you can now make a better one, and thus escape all pain that what you chose before has brought to you.

A Course in Miracles

How often do you audit your work life balance?

In business, one is encouraged to come up with  a plan which should be regularly reviewed …at least every 90 days. Achievable goals should be set and if they are not met , it’s OK to revise and tweak them so that a good outcome can be achieved. A good business plan will cover many areas, such as sales, marketing, networking and more. As the business evolves, so too does its needs. There is an ebb and flow of priorities in different areas.

For our personal lives too, we need to set goals so that we don’t just aimlessly drift into the sunset of dreams never fulfilled.  We may set a goal that  seems realistic at the time. Even setting what one networking person described to me as “a great big hairy audacious goal”.

All this is good,  but life will sometimes throw us a curve ball when we least expect it. The lessons to be learned when this happens are invaluable when we stop to reflect. Too much focus on a particular area will result in an imbalance in other areas unless we are diligent in maintaining a healthy work life balance. Many will be familiar with The Wheel of Life tool which is at the bottom of this post.

It’s important to have a positive mindset about any setbacks and ask ourselves the following questions.

  • What can I learn from this?
  • What could I do better next time?
  • What resources do I need to achieve the outcome I desire?
  • What goals do I need to set to achieve my outcome or vision?

Wheel of Life exercise

5 steps to overcoming overwhelm

Abundance, Choice, Coaching, extraordinary life, gratitude, , , , , ,
  1. When you are in overwhelm, it is helpful to think about what it is that you can do right now. By looking at the task as a whole and believebreaking it down into smaller, achievable tasks and thinking small for a moment, you will accomplish more. If there is a lack of movement in your life, consider how you can best use this time to move forward. When you have done that, look at today as the beginning of something new and positive, whilst letting go of the past.
  2. Declutter… you know the old adage…..” a tidy desk equals a tidy mind”…. But it’s more than that.. as you declutter; not only your desk, but your life… you free yourself to see a clear horizon and perhaps to answer your life purpose… Acknowledge that the journey is difficult at times. What skills, abilities do you already possess that will enable you to accomplish the tasks ahead? Look at what is positive in your life already……and try to go one day without any complaints….
  3. Believe in abundance. Trust that you can contribute to the Universe … to feel fear and lack is human…. Go into that feeling and learn from it and trust in the process of life…. map out on paper – or a white board – all the good things in your life already… we learn through the hard work that we do. Use your logic, your intuition and your spirituality to infuse your feelings so you become stronger and clearer.
  4. Consider your strengths…..see the light in others and see it reflected in you…..Use your experiences to make yourself stronger and more resilient. Be aware of self deception, we all make good and bad choices, but what is important is to be aware that they are yours…..
  5. Rest and relaxation. Are you getting enough rest or downtime? To do your best you need to have some time out. As written in the Four Agreements, “ You are alive , so take your life and enjoy it…” Set an intention to be in a state of joy and happiness, tune out anxiety and the daily worries to allow a space for enthusiasm and balance to be a part of every aspect of your life.

Personal Power

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change from a bud to blossomIt’s curious how the mind works… we can overthink a situation or a problem and tie ourselves up in emotional knots, getting stressed or overwrought …. yet when we finally allow ourselves to feel the rhythm of life and go with the flow of nature’s wisdom, we can blossom.

Perhaps it would be wise to take note of the wisdom of nature and connect with the subconscious mind and begin to acknowledge our innermost dreams. A flower doesn’t evade its life purpose or procrastinate when the time comes to blossom.  It doesn’t seek approval from outside itself…. it takes time to form a bud and then opens up and flowers.  Occasionally there are adverse conditions which may cause it to be vulnerable, but this is a strength…..

Be the gentle gardener of your soul and connect to the universal energy that surrounds us, acknowledge your journey thus far, recognise your self worth, knowledge and open to amazing opportunities as  you blossom……..

New Moon

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I was curious about what time the New Moon energy was coming in, so on the trip up to the retreat, I checked the Moon Phase app on my phone (& no, I wasn’t driving at the time). It was the 15th at 11.19am….. I checked the clock and it was 11.19am….. an auspicious start to the weekend with such a synchronicity!

Arriving at the retreat it was apparent that not much rain had fallen over the last 2 weeks, so the small tanks had not yet refilled. In the quest to fill the main concrete tank since the repair, which seems to have held up, we empty the smaller tanks into it on a regular basis in the hope that we won’t have to buy water over next summer. Every little bit helps.

With no major projects scheduled for this visit, I found a spot out of the breeze and sat down to write my new moon manifestation journal. As I meditated, I became more aware of the birdlife and occasionally could hear a ruffle of tiny feathers and catch a glimpse of the robin family as they went about their daily activities. Having completed my page, I made my way to the labyrinth, where it was pleasing to see no more digging by the local rabbit and the rose bush was relatively OK. A little frost burn on the top shoot, but some fat and healthy buds lower down. Hard to say what the Oak tree is doing  as all the others are looking very dormant too.

Labyrinth wattleThe two wattle trees in the labyrinth are just about to burst into bloom and one has some interesting galls on it. Love the pattern of the budded flower, reminding me of the Fibonacci numbers!

The yellow wattles surrounding the labyrinth had a quiet hum as the bees made the best of the pollen. This walk was slower than usual, focusing on each ring and visualizing the chakra colours as I progressed. Every so often, time to pause and move a stone on the path into the channel or small ditch that defines the outline.

Reaching the centre, I re-read the journal entry, slowly tore it into strips and then lit it, allowing the paper ash to be caught in the gentle breeze, carrying my words and pictures away. As I watched, I made the conscious intention to let go and let the universe take care of my requests.

Meditating in the centre, I was startled by the bang of a shed door on the neighbouring property. What seemed like an instant later, a large kangaroo burst out of the surrounding wattles into the space in front of the labyrinth, followed by a couple of smaller roos and 2 joeys. They paused…. I paused…. The larger kangaroos hopped off, leaving the little ones no further than 3 metres away and we looked at each other for a few more seconds…. an amazing moment ….then they were gone.

Next morning I went for a walk in the “Wild area” and found a spot which I think might be suitable for a “secret” labyrinth. It’s close to a rocky outcrop, so not far to move some stones to outline it. Perhaps a small 3 ring Cretan style labyrinth…… I’ve already got sites in mind for  a big 30m Chartres style and a Celtic style triskele walk.

I’ll keep you posted…….

Re-arranging the Labyrinth

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hole for rose bush in centre of labyrinthA family of rabbits has moved into the area and have been engaged in some major earthworks in and around the labyrinth, the last few months.

No warren sighted yet, but I’m keeping a look out.

However the earthworks in the photo are of my doing!

The Oak tree which showed great promise before being munched down a couple of times was moved over the weekend to stand at the entrance to the labyrinth and a rose bush has been installed in the centre.  Hopefully the thorns will deter the animals, but next trip I will put up some wire to keep it safe.

With the recent rains and the previous application of gypsum, the soil is much easier to dig now and two large holes were preparouter ring and centre redefineded with compost for the plants.

I also took the opportunity to redefine the outlines, removing all traces of the holes that the rabbits made digging out the sage and the garlic plants.

Eventually, there will be something that is not palatable for them. Perhaps they enjoy something a little more exotic than the lush green grass that is starting to sprout!

Another refurbishment of sorts happened with the toilet system.

A “wee diverterWee diverter” arrived and a new toilet was built for me, with the wee now diverted into a pit filled with rocks and ant sand.

As with all projects, nothing is simple although the finished toilet is practical and “throne like”.  Lucky we are tall and there isNew toilet installed a small platform or step being built for shorter people who might visit.  The kit came with the diverter and a polystyrene seat and lid – a little different to the standard toilet seat, but nice for winter!

compostingBuckets are sourced from the local takeaway shop in the city and the sawdust from the local sawmill in Rushworth. Permanent marker is not so permanent in the hot summer sunshine and tags made from aluminum cans with the dates scratched in are attached to the handles. The buckets are sealed for a minimum of 12 months before being used as a soil improver for the ornamental (deciduous) trees that I have been planting.

Collecting seeds is now one of my interests and there’s a shed full of empty pots to start another forest. Currently I’m waiting to see if another 3 oaks have germinated, and have some seed trays with Japanese Maple seeds in them.

Just recently, I gathered some Sheoak seeds and they are ready to plant.  Peppercorns have been sown directly into the soil along a fence line and it will be interesting to see what happens with them. I have asked for some nuts from a friend whose mother has a small orchard, but am thinking that the cockatoos will decimate them.

Next major project is to mend the horizontal fence.  More than a dozen of the old wooden posts have either rotted or been knocked down by kangaroos on their travels and along the length of the the fence is the local phone line. With more than half a kilometre of fence to repair, at this stage ….while the ground is soft… I’m going to get a dozen or so star pickets and put them alongside the fallen posts and wire the fencing to them. At least that will give the illusion of an upright fence!

 

Justice

balance, business, Intuition, lessons learned, , , , ,

Justice tarot cardI don’t profess to be a skilled Tarot card reader, but on occasion when I bump into a conundrum, I will shuffle the pack and deal out a card. If I have the time, I will do a full spread and consult the books and my intuition about what has been revealed.

Justice was the card that came out today.  It’s all about fairness, truth and karma. Quite fitting, considering the situation I was asking about.

The balanced scales held in the left, or feminine hand, can represent spiritual balance and intuition.  The right hand and masculine hand,  holds a double edged sword , representing logic. Justice has to balance that logic and intuition, remain impartial and choose a course of action with full awareness.

This card is about whether you have acted in fairness, truth or honesty.  Have you tipped the scales of justice affecting your karma? If you have been unfair, untruthful or dishonest in your dealings, then this is a warning to change your ways. It’s about being accountable for your actions  and making sure that you act in a fair and just manner.

So this card can then be a “call to action” in so many ways, reminding us to be even handed and balanced in our dealings with others.

Am I procrastinating about what should be done….. the right action?

Is my work life balance or my logic intuition balance OK?

Am I taking full responsibility for my actions…..past, present and future?

This card tells me that I need to rely more on my intuition, particularly in regards to working with others who may not have the same values of fairness, integrity or honesty. The card shows me that I must take responsibility for my actions and accept the lessons learned when dishonesty appears in my day. Moving on from the experience is part of the journey, as is accepting the karma as a result of the actions.

Six Signs of Sabotage

Coaching, Food Choices, Goal Setting, Weight Loss, , , ,

You’ve decided to do something about your weight. All goes well for a short time and then you may experience a plateau and in some cases a spiraling out of control and before you know it, you are back to where you started from.. perhaps even heavier.

How did that happen?

  1. Whilst a part of you wants to achieve success, there may be another part, an inner saboteur that is lurking within, ready to derail you. Sometimes the saboteur is someone near and dear to you. Family members, whilst often well-meaning, will sabotage your plans because of their own control issues. A partner may feel threatened by your new svelte and healthy appearance, subconsciously thinking that you will leave the relationship and sabotage your efforts by buying you chocolates or cakes.
  2. Are you drinking enough fluid? Water is preferable, but there are other non-calorific drinks such as herbal teas that are suitable. If you are dehydrated, you are sabotaging your weight loss by slowing the fat burning process down.
  3. Are you eating enough? Not eating enough puts the body into survival mode. After spending the night sleeping your blood sugar will have dropped, so skipping breakfast is another way to sabotage your weight loss. Make breakfast a priority and remember the saying “Eat breakfast like a King, lunch like a prince and dinner like a pauper.” Having a good breakfast will help with your concentration and give you more energy to get through the day.
  4. Are you eating too much? Sugars and refined carbohydrates can be sneaky little devils. Substituting with Aspartame or other chemical sweeteners is not the answer either. Watch your alcohol intake as it converts to a sugar when being processed by the liver. It is likely you are overestimating how much you are eating.  Even though you are choosing healthy foods on your weight loss journey, the portion size matters.
  5. You have bad habits around food. Sitting in front of the TV to eat is a common one. You will either be eating too quickly, or eating unconsciously. Set the table, eat mindfully, putting down your knife and fork between bites and really savour the food…the flavour and textures of your meal. Make it as much a feast for the eyes as it is about an intake of calories. Grazing on food, having “nibbles” readily available is another bad habit. Clear the pantry of those snacks, biscuits and other easy to eat temptations.
  6. Do you “treat” yourself with food? If that inner voice whispers to you “I lost weight so I deserve to have that chocolate/icecream/biscuit/cake…….” you need to review your mindset around food. That inner voice may also whisper to you “just one …..” which if you take the offer up, helps you to slide down the slippery slope of sabotage. If you are going to treat yourself, choose something that’s not food related, like a movie, a massage or a new item of clothing. Take a long term view of your weight loss journey and check in with your thoughts on a regular basis. Instead of thinking that you are deprived of something, change your mindset by asking “Is this a necessity?” or “Is this an obstacle to me achieving my goal weight?”

Chronic stress can also contribute to weight gain. Cortisol, released as part of the stress response, can cause you to have an increased appetite and to crave carbohydrates. A quick way to reduce stress is with exercise to counter the effects of the stress hormones and meditation to still the mind.

To help you still the mind, I’m sharing my 20 minute Easy Weight Loss video which you can use as a meditation or a screen saver.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SIYFBWAsmWs]

Health

balance, clarity, Coaching, friendship, ,

HealthAt a networking meeting that I co-host, I had a conversation with a couple of Reiki Masters….

I haven’t had a Reiki for myself for some time and have kept myself busy in various ways…. working on my business, the retreat…family…..day to day stuff…..

The question was asked…”what are you doing for YOU?” as I coughed, feeling it deep within my chest…. “what are you telling YOUR clients and not doing for yourself?”…..

I knew then, that there was no hiding…. no excuses! I couldn’t blame the alignment of the planets, other people…

Time to ‘fess up, so as to speak. Isn’t that what the metaphysics is all about? Oh Dear!! I felt all teary!     Cough…Throat Chakra? One of the Reiki Masters chuckled… that’s her speciality… pushing buttons…..

Yes… I needed that…. someone to ‘call me’ on my authenticity!

isn’t it amusing how the Universe works? It sends you clients who tell you “stuff” that you need to work on for yourself.

There are two options..

  1. Be like the metaphorical ostrich and stick your head in the sand and ignore what is going on – pretend nothing is wrong and carry on….
  2. Do something about it…. take the oxygen mask that has dropped down and look after yourself first before looking after others…

I shared a little of what I was feeling at the meeting, still holding back on other issues that I thought I would work some more on changing my mindset.

A colleague popped her head into my office between clients and offered an opinion – and  another friend phoned during a free moment…

I was feeling exhausted and hoping for the Universe to offer a solution….. which of course it did later this evening

… so with a few minutes left of a busy day, I have resolved to take up the offer of a Reiki and deal with some personal issues – so that I can be more present for the clients that have chosen to book in with me…..

 

 

Mindset

conversation, Goal Setting, Philosophy, ,

ResentmentRecently I was reminded of an old folk tale coming from the Cherokee tradition.

An elder was teaching a young boy to recognize his inner self.  He told the young boy, ” I have this fight going on inside me….. it is terrible, like a fight between two wolves. One wolf is evil. Full of anger, arrogance, resentment, envy, greed, lies, ego, superiority, false pride and self-doubt and self-pity.”

“The other wolf is good. This one is loving, peaceful, full of joy and compassion, hope, kindness, serenity, truthfulness and generosity.  Everyone, including you has this same fight inside.”

The young boy looked at the old man and after a moment of deep thought, asked the elder, “Which wolf wins?”

To which the elder replied, “The one you feed.”

When we feed either wolf, or our mindset, we also strengthen the neural networks within us. So if we are in a negative or fixed mindset most of the time, then that’s the one that gets fed. Likewise if it’s a growth or positive mindset.

How can we tell which is which?

A person with a fixed mindset is more likely to believe that success is achieved by innate talent. They will make excuses that they are not good at being creative, artistic, sporting and so on…and will often seek to hide or disguise their flaws. They make themselves familiar with failure and use words like “I wish……”

On the other hand, a person with a growth mindset believes that through determination and hard work,  success can and will be achievable. They seek opportunities to develop their creative, artistic, sporting skills and will create a “to do” list to address their flaws. A person with this mindset will see setbacks as challenges to overcome.

So feed the mindset that you want.

Have a vision and set some achievable goals.

Love what you do…….